Press & Media
Orb Magazine
It's a Zoo out there, plus other ways to make a connection
When Calgarian actor Adam Sterling found his relationship getting rocky last year, he decided to end it rather than go through any more breakups.
And he's been enjoying the single life ever since.
"The day I came to the realization to move on with my life, it was a great thing. I realized I just freed up four or five days of my week and I got back into acting, took some courses, started learning new things and concentrated on bettering myself," he says.
But what is there to do when you're single in Calgary?
"My job takes up a huge portion of my day, so meeting new people is tough. The bars are OK for eye candy, but the majority of people at the bar aren't looking for anything long term," says Sterling, 25.
If you're looking to meet other people, there are many services there to act as Cupid.
Tanya Kaynes, special events and promotions co-ordinator at the Calgary Zoo, says she created the Singles Safaris because the zoo is a quality place to meet people and, as a single person, she knows how hard it is to meet others these days.
"It's tough going on the Internet, because it's so cold and there's no way to make a judgment, and going to the bar is not an option for someone over 30," she says.
"The Singles Safari is very efficient because you can meet 100 people and you can have a great time - everyone at the singles events either hook up or they come back." The Singles Safari happens about five times a year, where 100 women and 110 men in age groups 25-40 and 40-plus attend a dinner, dance and play interactive get-to-know-you games.
Meredith Hopper, events co-ordinator for FastLife Speed Dating, says once a week, Calgarians of different age groups can try speed dating - a fun way to meet lots of people on 10 eight-minute dates. "You get a match card and if someone says yes to you, and you say yes to them, we exchange your preferred contact information," she says.
"Today, people are too busy to meet others the old-fashioned way and, with speed dating, you get to meet a bunch of people in one night and increase your chances of hitting it off."
Todd Holley, founder of LifeMates dating service, says since it opened in 1997, LifeMates has become very popular among those looking for a long-term, loving relationship.
"We bring people together with the same lifestyles, attitudes, values and goals and spend a lot of time matching these people before they meet one-on-one," he says.
"Technology was supposed to set us free and give us more leisure time but we're a lot busier than what we used to be. A lot of professionals are too busy to meet the right person and don't want to waste time meeting the wrong people." Dr. Patrick Keelan, registered psychologist at the Calgary Counselling Centre, points out with a booming economy, Calgary is home to many singles who came from out of province.
But many of them end up seeing him and complaining of being lonely, having a hard time meeting people and thinking they are inadequate because of it.
"The best way to meet people is to get involved in activities where a relationship is not the primary purpose, but allows for social interaction - something which you are good at, which allows you to build your self-esteem and allows you to connect with other people," he says.
"If Internet dating or speed dating works for you, go for it. The downside is people directly pursue an intimate relationship without having fulfilled other parts of their lives."
But Sterling says he prefers online dating, now that the Internet has lost its former reputation for being "geeky."
"There are thousands of men and women online and you can see what their interests are, what they look like and you can keep it impersonal to start, before moving to the phone and then to the date. I usually have success online," he says.
